The next write-up, written on the 11th of August 2008 at around 10:25 p.m., was for someone named 'Choy'. This person used to be a very close friend but when we got tempted to indulge into a 'trial relationship' (at the time when both of our own relationships were on the rocks), sadly, the friendship ended. True to what they say, if you don't want to lose a friend, don't fall in love with them. And all the regrets I had when I came to the point of letting him go were poured down into this write-up. Having moved on, I could only remember all the lessons it taught me...
They always say be careful in letting someone go because you might regret it in the end. Well, perhaps they're right. Because now, I'm regretting why I did that single thing.
I thought then that that was the right thing to do especially that you've got your girl back and everything between us was very much complicated. So I chose to let go and give up my love for you. I knew firsthand that I was fighting a losing battle. I kept telling myself that I would move on and I would just give myself some time to adjust. I even told myself that I would soon love again...
But where am I now? I'm still stuck on the same ground that I am standing today. I haven't moved on... Stupid it may be, but I wish now that I haven't let go of what we had, regardless of how uncertain it may be. I wish I had the courage to hold on when things between us started to shake. But I was so weak. Perhaps because I was so afraid I'd get hurt again...
And yet, I haven't finished picking up my broken pieces. Everytime I try to fix it, there would always be a missing piece: You. Yes of course I've seen you countless of times with your girl and I do get hurt; but I realized I can endure those pains, as long as, somehow, you're still mine. But now you're gone. And I guess it'll stay that way forever. I regret everything, yes I do. But my greatest regret was when I let that single chance of telling you "I love you" slip away. I shouldn't have laughed about it. I should have admitted what I really felt...
But all's been said and done. I love you, but it would never change anything between us now. But if only it could, I would just like to let you know how much I would change Myself, the Relationship, and the End... I wish we'd never end up as what we are now: Strangers...
They always say be careful in letting someone go because you might regret it in the end. Well, perhaps they're right. Because now, I'm regretting why I did that single thing.
I thought then that that was the right thing to do especially that you've got your girl back and everything between us was very much complicated. So I chose to let go and give up my love for you. I knew firsthand that I was fighting a losing battle. I kept telling myself that I would move on and I would just give myself some time to adjust. I even told myself that I would soon love again...
But where am I now? I'm still stuck on the same ground that I am standing today. I haven't moved on... Stupid it may be, but I wish now that I haven't let go of what we had, regardless of how uncertain it may be. I wish I had the courage to hold on when things between us started to shake. But I was so weak. Perhaps because I was so afraid I'd get hurt again...
And yet, I haven't finished picking up my broken pieces. Everytime I try to fix it, there would always be a missing piece: You. Yes of course I've seen you countless of times with your girl and I do get hurt; but I realized I can endure those pains, as long as, somehow, you're still mine. But now you're gone. And I guess it'll stay that way forever. I regret everything, yes I do. But my greatest regret was when I let that single chance of telling you "I love you" slip away. I shouldn't have laughed about it. I should have admitted what I really felt...
But all's been said and done. I love you, but it would never change anything between us now. But if only it could, I would just like to let you know how much I would change Myself, the Relationship, and the End... I wish we'd never end up as what we are now: Strangers...
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